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Addiction, Cancer, Life & Death By Joe S. Thomas
*** I had one of my spastic, wake-up abruptly, panic moments the other day and something’s been on my mind since… It’s been hanging over me like a cloud that I can’t seem to shake… It’s been with me for a while honestly… There have been many crises within the crisis that is often what… Continue reading
death, Depression, Family, friendship, Life, Loss, love, Mental Health, nonfiction, questions, rage, truthaddiction, anger, Cancer, death, Depression, Empathy, Family, feelings, guilt, insomnia, Life, Mental Health, pain, pain pills, rage, reaching out, Sympathy -
Tailor Made Pain and Hurt By Joe S. Thomas
*** Today I had a feeling that for some reason I really needed to reach out to my ex fiance’ and share with her a photo of my daughter’s new son… She’s always loved children and never had any of her own… We were together for over eleven years for those who aren’t familiar… Though… Continue reading
counterculture, death, Depression, disability, friendship, Life, Loss, love, Mental Health, Neurodivergence, nonfiction, questions, rage, truthblame, Cancer, death, decisions, defeated, Depression, Empathy, ex’s, feelings, forgiveness, hurt, Life, lifetime, lonliness, love, pain, questioning, relationships, Sympathy, Time, unwanted, wasted time -
One of My Role Models By Joe S. Thomas
*** Again, unable to sleep tonight and listening to John Waters’ audiobook Role Models… It got me thinking of childhood and who I would consider the character I wanted to be, who I first saw and came to know about and then wanted to become through television… As a kid I religiously read Incredible Hulk… Continue reading
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Anxiety, Panic Attacks and Agoraphobia Part 2 By Joe S. Thomas
*** Continued-After many attempts and many hundreds of dollars lost, I finally made the emergency room doctors understand that I was having a legitimate problem and that I wasn’t faking for some sort of attention or wasn’t a drug seeker… At the time I didn’t know what a drug seeker even happened to be… This… Continue reading
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Questions Raised By Joe S. Thomas
*** I received and started reading a new book today and like good books should do, this one has me thinking and questioning certain things… The book is volume 1 of 3 volumes called Black Heart Fades Blue By Jerry A. Lang, the singer for the Portland, Oregon punk band Poison Idea… The first volume,… Continue reading
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The Necessity of Unplugging By Joe S. Thomas
If I’m being honest with myself, within myself and even with you, (those with whom I attempt to speak to or communicate with somehow), I must unplug from everything and leave my mind chock full of absolute emptiness if I’m to say anything interesting whatsoever… In my mind, the times I have something interesting to… Continue reading
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Cubby/Hubert Selby Jr. By Joe S. Thomas
I don’t recall when I first became a fan of Hubert Selby Jr… It’s been many years now… I’m fairly certain I have Henry Rollins to thank for it, so, thank you Henry, sincerely… I was listening to the Henry and Heidi podcast out of boredom and insomnia tonight… I’ve listened to each of the… Continue reading
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Into the Void By Joe S. Thomas
*** It made me sick when I heard those words come out of his mouth… The words my sister’s widower spoke to the hideous thing still cuddled up nice and warm in the exact spot my sister took her last breath and passed over into death and whatever that entails… I love you… These were… Continue reading
death, Depression, disability, Family, Journaling, Life, Loss, love, Mental Health, Neurodivergence, nonfiction, questions, rage, therapy, truth, writinganger, Cancer, death, Depression, Empathy, Family, feelings, home, Life, love, mastectomy, Mental Health, pain, shame, writing -
Starts, Stops and Depression By Joe S. Thomas
*** I’ve had a few starts and stops on the unfortunate and very true story I’d like to tell about how I ended up here where I’m having to live now and why I can’t seem to get away… The manic episode, the arrests due to said manic episode, the beating that left me with… Continue reading
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Not a Very Good Time By Joe S. Thomas
*** More of my good friend and the evil bastard insomnia visiting me tonight after hearing the morons I have to live among wrenching doors open and digging through the kitchen like 400 pound cockroaches at 2 A.M… And people wonder why I hate, why I’m suicidal… Do you really have to think that hard… Continue reading